To which, decidedly so, I told the panic attack to bug off and find someone else to plague. And so I've put off my new year resolutions until last weekend, when I finally felt a stirring for greatness well up within me; great and manageable resolutions did I make. After pondering my resolutions, I snarked, "It's all Chrissy's and Caite's fault..." out loud, which then provoked an inquiry by the husband about what the heck I was up to now (which I'm sure is a constant thought in Steven's head...I don't blame him.). And so I told him the following:
I will start blogging every day. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y. It's part of my pact to make peace with vulnerability. To which I blame Chrissy entirely. She told me something, in all her sage-like glory, on the phone a few months back when I was expressing my delight in having a relationship with my sister again. I was expressing how much I love Janessa, no matter what she's up against or what she'd battled in the past. Chrissy then said, "You should tell her that, Tiff. She needs to know that she doesn't need to hide anything from you or edit her life so that it fits your standards and beliefs." So I did tell her. And it was awesome, because it taught me something about myself, about Chrissy, about Janessa. We all need to hear that we are safe to be who we are. And that started my whole "Vulnerability Vigil." So, one thing I struggle with is being vulnerable enough to blog about my life, which I'm very uncertainly positive my life is, in a way, sort of interesting...This would mean that it would be out there for the whole world to scrutinize. So I buried that uncomfortable notion. Until I read Caitlin's blog posts and realized how much I value her everyday comings and goings. And I do value Chrissy's everyday comings and goings. They were willing to be vulnerable and embrace it...So yes, I'm blogging everyday now to push back my fears...and it's all Chrissy's and Caitlin's fault.
Another resolution was to constantly be working on a knitting and sewing project--for myself. I normally craft for the enjoyment of others. I'm finally ready to craft for myself. It got me thinking about the beginning rumblings within me to take my tastes and preferences and translate them into form and color and function. I then started to ponder into a whirlpool of which is named "Fiber Art." This is not the artwork credited to eating enough whole grains! This is the gateway drug into spending all of your money and time on creating heavenly objects upon which to dote....a.k.a. "eye candy." Again, this is all entirely Chrissy's and Caite's fault. If Chrissy hadn't sat me down and given me easter-colored fabric with a duck on it, to make out of it a small pillow stuffed with toilet paper, whilst sitting on a very ugly couch (sorry, Mom) in the basement of that Farmington house....I wouldn't have this insatiable appetite for fiber. And Caite didn't help much, either, with her charming dabbles into cross-stich, sewing, and needlepoint. Both of them were creating these gorgeous cross-stitch revelations, sewing fine costumes and apparel, beautiful crazy quilting, and then.......then they started knitting. I'm always a step behind them, but not far off. And now I am definitely in over my head. And my future plans all started with Caite and Chrissy, my "fiber dealers" (as Steven puts it...he even jokes that I'll call one of them for a new project or "fix"). It's all Chrissy's and Caite's fault.
Another resolution was to continue expanding my recipe library. I made it a whoppin' 8 months last year with last year's resolution: Cook a New Recipe for Dinner Every Night. And I miss the adventure of cooking new things with ingredients I hadn't explored yet. But I thought, it's in the past, no use in dragging it to the surface again...Until Chrissy and Caite started to do a month's worth of freezer meals. They've found loads of good recipes, and it plucked at my heartstrings to venture out again. Like I said before, it's all Chrissy's and Caite's fault.
Jokes aside, it is wonderful to have two best friends who are so similar to myself. Who wouldn't want two witty, plucky partners in crime? Plus, they egg on habits, that for the most part, are very healthy for me. Here's to a new year with some awesome common goals!
No comments:
Post a Comment